Wendy L. Patrick, J.D., M.Div., Ph.D.

Many people know someone who is being abused by an intimate partner. Among family, friends, neighbors, or co-workers, even suspecting abuse behind the scenes sparks concerns for safety. As a career prosecutor, I have written previously about why domestic violence victims return to abusers,[i] how to spot domestic violence in the workplace,[ii] and how some abusers are able to make dangerous traits look desirable.[iii] Yet one of the most insidious ways in which perpetrators thwart justice and evade accountability is by coercing victims to recant. Research explains.

Reframing Violence and Victimization

Amy E. Bonomi et al. (2011) studied real cases post-abuse, where suspects attempted to persuade their victims to recant.[iv] Using a sample of 25 heterosexual couples, the research team examined live telephone conversations between domestic violence perpetrators and victims to find out how and why victims decided to recant and/or resist prosecution. In all of the cases they studied, the male perpetrator was detained for felony-level domestic violence and called the female victim during his incarceration pre-prosecution. Examining 30-192 minutes of conversational data for each couple, Bonomi et al. recorded the interpersonal processes linked with the victim’s intention to recant, as well as how the couple constructed their recantation plan.

Acknowledging the underlying coercive interpersonal dynamic, their results demonstrated that the victim’s intention to recant was most influenced by perpetrator appeals to sympathy. These included descriptions of suffering from both mental and physical conditions, “intolerable” conditions in jail, and one we have heard many times in post-abuse settings, the unimaginable thought of life without the victim. Bonomi et al. reported that perpetrator tactics also included minimization of the abuse, as well as both parties envisioning life apart from each other.

Once a victim decided to recant, the couple created a recantation plan by redefining the abuse to protect the perpetrator, blamed the state for their separation, and agreed on specifics regarding next steps. In this fashion, within ongoing interactions between suspects and victims, Bonomi et al. identified how perpetrators used strategies of sympathy appeals and minimization to successfully persuade their victims to recant, as well as strategies the couple used together to preserve their relationship.

Witness Tampering

Bonomi et al. call out this perpetrator strategy by name: witness tampering. Acknowledging familiarity among prosecutors and victim advocates, they identify this strategy as a significant problem in prosecuting domestic violence. Consistent with the theme of manipulation, however, they also note the conspicuous absence of direct threats. Only one perpetrator in their study directly threatened the victim, warning: “If you go against me on this one, it’s gonna be the worst mistake you ever make in your whole life.” They note that although all couples may risk future violence, the perpetrators in their study used more sophisticated strategies of persuasion.

Minimization and descriptions of suffering successfully triggered victim sadness, guilt, and sympathy, motivating them to change their stories to protect their abusers. Bonomi et al. also revealed the victims’ expressed desire to maintain the relationship, and joint efforts both parties used to shape the recantation plan. By blaming the prosecution, for example, a couple teamed up as joint “victims” against an “unfair judicial process.”

Pursuing Prevention and Intervention

Recognizing the significant challenges faced in addressing the insidious epidemic of domestic violence, we continue to pursue efforts at prevention and intervention. If you see something, say something; and for partners experiencing abuse, personal and professional help is available.

References

[i] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202107/why-do-domestic-violence-victims-return-to-abusers.

[ii] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202503/spotting-domestic-violence-in-the-workplace.

[iii] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202305/with-domestic-abusers-dangerous-traits-can-look-desirable.

[iv] Bonomi, Amy E., Rashmi Gangamma, Chris R. Locke, Heather Katafiasz, and David Martin. “‘Meet Me at the Hill Where We Used to Park’: Interpersonal Processes Associated with Victim Recantation.” Social Science & Medicine 73, no. 7 (October 1, 2011): 1054–61.

Originally published at Psychology Today

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